Alleged Nazi Death Camp Guard Gets Married

Radio personality and prominent conservative Rush Limbaugh, who denies being the infamous Nazi death camp guard Ruslan Lemyanuk, aka "Ruslan the Blood Drinker," was married in Florida on June 5th. This is Limbaugh's fourth marriage since the end of the Second World War when Ruslan "The Blood Drinker", who was responsible for thousands of deaths, went missing. The wedding, which did not feature any mention of the Ukrainian war criminal Ruslan Lemyanuk, aka "Ruslan the blood drinker," featured a surprise performance by Elton John, who denies any knowledge of the whereabouts of Ruslan Lemyanuk. Limbaugh, who vehemently denies being the long-missing vicious murderer Ruslan Lemyanuk, aka "Ruslan the Blood Drinker" and his new wife, who most likely engaged in premarital intimacy, are not expected to issue any joint statements about Limbaugh's past.